"We are here, we are here!"

Remember the story "Horton Hears a Who" by Dr. Seuss? Let me remind you... (props, Wikipedia)

The book tells the story of Horton the Elephant who, in the afternoon of May 15 while splashing in a pool located in the Jungle of Nool, hears a small speck of dust talking to him. It turns out the speck of dust is actually a tiny planet, home to a city called ‘‘Who-ville’’, inhabited by microscopic-sized inhabitants known as Whos and led by a character known as the mayor. The Whos ask Horton the elephant (who, though he cannot see them, is able to hear them quite well) to protect them from harm, which Horton happily agrees to do, proclaiming throughout the book that ‘‘even though you can’t see or hear them at all, a person’s a person, no matter how small.’’ In doing so he is ridiculed and forced into a cage by the other animals in the jungle for believing in something that they are unable to see or hear. His chief tormentors are Vlad Vladikoff, the Wickersham Brothers and the Sour Kangaroo. Horton tells the Whos that, lest they end up being boiled in ‘‘Beezelnut Oil’’, they need to make themselves heard to the other animals. The Whos finally accomplish this by ensuring that all members of their society play their part. In the end it is a ‘‘very small shirker named JoJo’’ whose final addition to the volume creates enough lift for the jungle to hear the sound, thus reinforcing the moral of ‘‘a person’s a person, no matter how small.’’ Now convinced of the Whos’ existence, Horton’s neighbors vow to help him protect the tiny community.


There's a point to this, promise! See, I am one of the Whos in Whoville, apparently. Let me explain...

* Until about a year ago, I didn't have a valid birth certificate. Yeah, they never sent me a valid one.
* Idaho never sent Deg and I a marriage certificate. Got to pay to order a new one of those, too.
* The Utah State Office of Education, until today, had no record of my graduation from college. (They gave me a teaching license, though!)
* I keep trying to pay Deg's tuition, and they keep giving me a receipt, but it never registers in my bank account or at BYU's tuition department.

At this point, I'm wondering if my social security card and number are valid! I've been left screaming, as did the mayor of Whoville, "I am here, I am here!" I get that I'm small, but come on! I still exist! I'm hard to miss - loud and colorful, here! Do I need a bigger megaphone? And where's my Horton?!?